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Not diabetic enough.


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Old 08-03-2014, 16:10   #1
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Default Not diabetic enough.

Just got schooled in private by my best friend whose D is on the more severe spectrum. we never fight, but this is a bone of contention that I call myself D. Really bugs her. Now, should I care? No. But of course I care about this bugging her as she is on meds. I didn't go after her about the food choices she makes, but I got an earful. So, I asked her to respect that I believe that Pre-D is a load of crap and FB starts at 5.9, and if I go off LCHF, and I'm going to have complications. My doctor thinks I'm 5 years away from meds. I hope to prove him wrong.

I know this group understands the tough process of justifying and explaining. Just was frustrating, exhausting, and upsetting.

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Old 08-03-2014, 16:43   #2
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I wish the whole prediabetes facade did not exist.

It misleads so many people into thinking they may have a problem sometime in the nebulous future when - especially if HbA1c or FBG is the diagnostic tool - they may actually have had an emergency for awhile.

Don't play the game Mollie, take a deep breath and let it go. Next time it comes up, smile and nod and change the subject.

I have thought a lot about people who need to play the "I'm sicker than you are" game.

Sometime in the future you are still going to be in control. And your friend - especially if she does not fight at all times for tight BG control - is going to prove she is much, much sicker than you are. And neither of you are going to feel like she won the game.

Hugs! Can't say I am behind you 100% because I am jogging right there beside you.

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wf, 63yo, 5'4", 110 lbs
LCHF diet-controlled T2
DXd myself with PP BG over 270
DX 12/13 with A1C 5.9
8/26/14 HbA1c 5.5
avg BG: 90 - 95 before meals, 100 - 110 one hour PP, 95 2 hours PP
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Old 08-03-2014, 16:50   #3
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Yep, that's just it. She lives overseas and we only see each other online. I respect her, but I do not have the energy to debate. On FB I will identify as Pre. I don't want this to come between us, but I think she is very wrong. I also think she is in a very large group who could be in the 5's or 6's if they made effort.

I think getting down to the low to mid 5's is being seen as cured by her. Problem of a lot of T2s.

Thanks for the support, Nancy!

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Old 08-03-2014, 16:53   #4
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And next time the subject comes up, you have to ask her again to respect your position, tell her too that you refuse to entertain any further discussion and if she introduces it again, you will leave the room and not come back until she's ready to drop it forever. As Nancy says, this 'I'm sicker than you' game is ridiculous!



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Old 08-03-2014, 16:57   #5
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I've got to say that I'm 100% with Nancy.

I've said it elsewhere on the forum but I'll say it again anyway. This isn't a competition - it's a fight for health long term - nothing else.

What I need to do to manage my health is probably different from what you need to do, and that'll be different for your friend. If we all get it right - for ourself - we all win!

Disparaging someone's effort as unnecessary since "you're not as sick as me" is a rather sad action to take. I hope your friend takes your taking things seriously to heart and learns from you. We can all hope.

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Old 08-03-2014, 17:01   #6
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Absolutely good advice. We went back and forth offline this AM, with me trying to justify my position. I hate folding, but I rarely talk about it, don't preach, do not tell anyone that they shouldn't be eating this or that. But I was told that my identifying myself as D when I was not on meds was driving her crazy. I'll say pre-d on FB to quell the situation. I'm just tired. I'm D, and I eat the right way. That's enough for me.

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Old 08-03-2014, 17:02   #7
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Thanks, John. I think avoidance is the best approach. I can't play the game- too much riding on it.

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Old 08-03-2014, 17:04   #8
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I'm forced to agree - sad - but true - flogging dead horses is very tiring.

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Old 08-03-2014, 17:09   #9
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I actually was getting worked up enough to almost write "i have friends who have been hospitalized and their A1c's have make yours look like pre. They get it and they are supportive". But it's moot. My regret is that I spent time being upset over it today and got worked up. Thank goodness that I have this forum to vent. Really appreciate it.
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Old 08-03-2014, 17:46   #10
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Just one more thing- my thread purpose was not to bash my friend. It's just an illustration that the ADA's hard definition creates dissent amongst diabetics of all spectrums. Sad.

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