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Hi, my name is Buffy and I was diagnosed with diabetes type 2 in November of 2009. I spent a year feeling awful after several attacks of pancreatitis and having my gall bladder removed. I have a significant family history of diabetes. I am on meds only for the moment but recently my numbers have been hovering around 250 and last night they stayed over 300 (as high as 374) all night. Today I have been hovering around 250-275. I take metformin (2000 mg) and amaryl (8mg) for the diabetes; however, I take about a million more for high blood pressure, high cholesterol; bipolar disorder etc. I haven't been able to feel my feet for almost three years and the neurologist says that currently the nerve damage extends to my ankles. OK now it's confession time: I despise testing and I'm not very good about it. I am about 60 lbs overweight and have no motivation to lose it. I cheat on my diet A LOT. But I have 4 beautiful children, ages 4-18, and a wonderful husband, and a great career. I have a lot of guilt and right now I just feel terribly sad. I feel terrible most of the time. I have several great diabetes books and I have also done quite a bit of research about diabetes. I feel overwhelmed, confused, and sad. My family is very supportive but I'm a brat. I don't want to continue this way so I need help. I don't know how to beat this. Right now, I'm sitting here bawling. Thanks for giving me a place to vent.
 

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Come sit down here & take a deep breath, Buffy. One of the best things about this forum is the support we find here when the going gets tough. I won't dry your tears, but I'll assure you that you can get a handle on this one step at a time. I'm a fat old granny who's stubborn as a mule . . . never would have believed I could alter my lifestyle to accommodate diabetes & actually CONTROL it! But working together we can do it . . . we can support & comfort & advocate for each other.

I do hope you have time to visit us often . . . I'm glad you found us & I hope you like it here.
 

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Welcome Buffy! I think being here is a tremendous first step in staring down your diabetes and moving towards taking back control of your body from it. It's hard, I think, trying to manage diabetes in an environment where everything's the same =except= this overwhelming, time-consuming, annoying, frustrating disease.

The great thing about being here is that we're all working towards the same goal. It has been inspirational for me to see alll the people here who have achieved control, but remain vigilant to maintain it. And it has been validating to know I'm not alone, can ask any question and do any kvetching I need to do, and there's a community that understands.

Please stick around. If you do, I think you'll find some of the same inspiration I have - it has been invaluable in helping me start my own journey with this disease.
 

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Welcome to DF Buffy. I think we all feel overwhelmed at times with Diabetes. I think the important thing is we do whatever we need to get the numberes down. Have your numbers been that high since your dx or just recently? I have only been D for 4 years but have learned so much about how we are all different. The amount of your control depends on how much pancreatic function you have left. At some point lots of us need extra help to give our natural insulin a boost. You might want to talk to your doctor about adding a long acting insulin like Lantus or Levimer to your diabetes management. If you are on oral meds and they are not working, it is the next step. If your pancreas is not working efficiently you may just need a little extra help.
 

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Hi, my name is Buffy and I was diagnosed with diabetes type 2 in November of 2009. I spent a year feeling awful after several attacks of pancreatitis and having my gall bladder removed. I have a significant family history of diabetes. I am on meds only for the moment but recently my numbers have been hovering around 250 and last night they stayed over 300 (as high as 374) all night. Today I have been hovering around 250-275. I take metformin (2000 mg) and amaryl (8mg) for the diabetes; however, I take about a million more for high blood pressure, high cholesterol; bipolar disorder etc. I haven't been able to feel my feet for almost three years and the neurologist says that currently the nerve damage extends to my ankles. OK now it's confession time: I despise testing and I'm not very good about it. I am about 60 lbs overweight and have no motivation to lose it. I cheat on my diet A LOT. But I have 4 beautiful children, ages 4-18, and a wonderful husband, and a great career. I have a lot of guilt and right now I just feel terribly sad. I feel terrible most of the time. I have several great diabetes books and I have also done quite a bit of research about diabetes. I feel overwhelmed, confused, and sad. My family is very supportive but I'm a brat. I don't want to continue this way so I need help. I don't know how to beat this. Right now, I'm sitting here bawling. Thanks for giving me a place to vent.
Hello Buffy and :welcome: to the forum! Make yourself comfortable and get busy reading what interests you the most. What do you despise about testing? We need to get you to be a good tester and then you will see that frequent testing is a great tool for good control. OK, so Buffy, you admit being a brat, we can help you. What can we do to help you the most right now? We will do whatever we can to help you...here's a tissue to wipe away the tears....I hope you will visit often and take care! :)
 
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welcome Buffy :) we're all understanding here as we all have the same disease we're dealing with. I believe that a positive attitude is the first key towards getting control of diabetes. All we can do is try our best and sometimes that isn't good enough as diabetes has a tendancy to surprise us with BGL numbers we don't want to see. Perhaps you don't like testing because you don't want to see the readings? I know that feeling... I thought that way too years back and I struggled with the idea of testing until I realised it's the only way to know what is going on... and that I need to know what is going on with me so I could also explain it to my docs. Docs rely on us to do the testing too. But really you want to do the testing for you.... you then have the upper hand and you're then able to do something to control your BGLs. I agree with everyone elses comments...and it really is one step at a time... but it starts with the right attitude and I like to call it "putting the happy hat on" or "smile at the storm". Even if things may not look so great right now... envision the light at the end of that tunnel and know it's achievable to get better control. We're all here to cheer you on. :cheer2:
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Wow! Thank you so much everyone for your sweet kind comments. Right now I think I need to take some time to really learn about my disease. I've already scheduled an appointment for Monday to discuss my current treatment plan and really evaluate what's best for me. I've also learned a couple of things through my reading the last few days: insulin is not the "last resort" nor does it necessarily have to be forever. I've been extremely resistant to making any kind of change and I am trying to cut that nonsense out. Being here and reading through a lot of the posts has been very positive for me and I already love you all for cheering me on. I promise I will keep trying and do what I have to to control my disease. Thanks!
 
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