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Ugh, I can't wait for the holidays to be over. I have been fighting a constant battle since Thanksgiving and can now admit that I lost... I started out pretty good but with all the parties, dinners, family drama, driving to everywhich place, having house guests... Kill me now! 
At first I would hold strong and be the odd one out eating my normal way. The past few weeks I got tired of the questions, hurt feelings and explanations. Even when I don't explain myself, and just do my thing everyone's reaction wears on me. So I have been adding a small portion of potato, or not refusing the "small slice" of cake thrust in front of me, etc. The results have been ... predictable.
Since Thursday I have had my husband's friends from out of town staying with us. They stay up until 3-4 am, get up at noon and in general have thrown my entire life out of whack. I feel like such a poor host, going to bed before them (stayed up till 1am when normally I am in bed at 9pm), eating meals without them but enough is enough. There is nowhere in the apartment I can go to just relax and not be "hosting". I just do not have the right personality for this stuff, I need my alone time to recharge.
It's also frustrating that I can't even have a discussion with my husband. We are never alone! I went to the endo on Thursday and was referred to a cardiologist and still haven't told him. Since I'm feeling hurt, underappreciated, petty and vindictive, maybe he won't find out for awhile!
Anyhoo, the guests are leaving tonight, thank god. I can't wait to clean my house, hug a cat, eat some salad and start over.
Sorry, I'm done whining and ranting now.
I know what I need to do, I give people pep talks all the time for the same complaints... :violin: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
At first I would hold strong and be the odd one out eating my normal way. The past few weeks I got tired of the questions, hurt feelings and explanations. Even when I don't explain myself, and just do my thing everyone's reaction wears on me. So I have been adding a small portion of potato, or not refusing the "small slice" of cake thrust in front of me, etc. The results have been ... predictable.
Since Thursday I have had my husband's friends from out of town staying with us. They stay up until 3-4 am, get up at noon and in general have thrown my entire life out of whack. I feel like such a poor host, going to bed before them (stayed up till 1am when normally I am in bed at 9pm), eating meals without them but enough is enough. There is nowhere in the apartment I can go to just relax and not be "hosting". I just do not have the right personality for this stuff, I need my alone time to recharge.
It's also frustrating that I can't even have a discussion with my husband. We are never alone! I went to the endo on Thursday and was referred to a cardiologist and still haven't told him. Since I'm feeling hurt, underappreciated, petty and vindictive, maybe he won't find out for awhile!
Anyhoo, the guests are leaving tonight, thank god. I can't wait to clean my house, hug a cat, eat some salad and start over.
Sorry, I'm done whining and ranting now.